Saturday, December 20, 2008

The Tommy Westphall Universe?!?!

Maybe it's because I'm drunk off jagermeister and pomegranate rockstar, but this just blows me away.

I know I'm probably the only person I know who would read through all this, but basically it boils down to the fact that the series finale shows that the entire show took place in the mind of an autistic kid named Tommy Westphall. Seems like a shitty "it was only a dream" way to end a show until you realize that St. Elsewhere crossed over with some other shows. And those shows crossed over with other shows. Well, if St. Elsewhere and its characters were all in the mind of that autistic kid than all the shows that are linked to it through crossover must also be inside the mind of that kid.

The final count of imaginary shows? 282, including 26 that are still on the air right now. I bet you had no idea that you were watching imaginary television.

Monday, December 08, 2008

Wii Fuck

I posted this on craigslist the other night as a sort of homage to the original marios bros. sex post:

I want to stick a wiimote in your vagina and see how well you can play super mario galaxy. If you can't get a grand star I will punch you in the fucking face. You can hold the nunchuk with your hand, but if you touch that wiimote there will be trouble.
It's not much as I was probably drunk and too incoherent to write a proper paragraph, but it gets the point across. It's nowhere near the masterpiece of the original though.

Well hello there.


Let me go out on a limb and say that sunrise earth is the best show ever. Way better than actual sunrise.

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Happy holidays


lady who begs outside the montgomery street station has a buddy now.


I had a dream last night that had something to do with someone wanting me to fly to India and set off some plastic explosives. I had the explosives in my pocket and I was wandering around the airport terminal. And then there were some wild pigs roaming around the food court area. I thought they were cute so I started petting one, but the little bastard could some the plastic explosives in my pocket. I freaked out and left the squishy ball of exploding on a bench and someone sat on it. Very weird.

Wednesday, December 03, 2008


Today I'm pretending that I'm a spy in deep cover in the retail industry. It's easy to imagine that my bosses are Iranian agents.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008


I can't seem to draw anything but faces anymore. Dynamic, proportioned figure drawing seems totally lost to me. Even my articulated wooden mannequin is no help.

Fictional Spaces

.Sometimes, in certain places in the city, I imagine not only the history of those places but the fictional histories and fictional futures of those places. The places and characters overlap. Adrian Monk investigates a murder at Star Fleet Academy, while the X-men battle the toy soldier Army of Emperor Norton. It's a little confusing sometimes. It could be worse. I could live in New York.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Imagine what I'd see if I explored San Francisco more

Here's an example of some of the things I see near Market and New Montgomery streets when I'm walking around durign my breaks at work:

It's a jacket tree.
It's a little hard to see, but that's a spiderweb made out of wire on the statue on Market and Montgomery (the one with the guy raising the flag) and it says "Some Pig". I'm anxious to see if there's more phrases from Charlotte's Web this week.

I'm not sure of the little fuzzball in the upper right corner is supposed to be Charlotte, an egg sac a or a tasty caterpillar.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Breakfast all day

Dean Greco
I decided to vote by absentee ballot in New Jersey this time around and one of the candidates I found on the official NJ voter website.  I noticed that his party was listed as the "Breakfast All Day" Party.  This is what's listed under his "views on issues":
"A) My goal is to promote breakfast as the most delicious meal of the day. I feel that people in the 7th district and nationwide often overlook the importance of breakfast. Breakfast foods are so good that you can really eat them any time of day (even for dinner). Try eating a dinner food for breakfast. 7am hotdogs?…yuck! I feel that more emphasis should be put on breakfast on a national level. If everyone started the day with a delicious breakfast, then surely all of our other problems could be dealt with in a more rational manner. If elected, I will fight to make Election Day a National Breakfast Awareness Day. Voting is one of the most important privileges we have in the US. You wouldn't want to make this decision on an empty stomach. I will also fight for benefits for our nation's farmers – the men and women who help put so many of our beloved breakfast foods on the table."
This country is both incredible and retarded.  Or just incredibly retarded.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Friday, September 19, 2008

Monday, September 01, 2008

Italians say "Ah". The French say somethng between "Ooh" and "Uh"

Wednesday, August 27, 2008


radio shack meetings are like a circus sideshow. one of us. one of us.

Monday, August 18, 2008


I shall be in New Jersey starting September 17th. I expect gifts.
my mom added me on facebook. truly weird.

Sunday, August 17, 2008


please stop wasting my time and yours by asking me questions for a half hour about headphone splitters. they split one headphone jack into two. that's it. move on.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008


“Batman, I’ve heard disturbing reports that you ripped the Joker’s nipples off.”“Choke on my fuck, Commissioner Gordon.”“…okay.”

Friday, July 18, 2008

i am being crazy at work today. doing karate on customers. at least i'm not getting bitches pregnant.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008


It is a slow-ass day at work today. Right now I am the only person in the store. I sort of want to lock the door and just play with radio controlled toys. That's exactly what I would have done if I was at my store in San Diego. That shit was stressful being a manager, but it was nice being able to just fuck around sometimes.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Bike Riding

Ross and I totally did the bike tour of the city today. We rode around Golden Gate Park for a while 'cause they close one of the roads on Sundays for bikes and pedestrians. We didn't know that it was the walk for breast cancer today. There were hundreds of middle-aged ladies in pink shirts in the park. Throngs of them clogged up the road. I suggested that they should show us their tits. I don't think that went over well.

After dicking around in the park we headed west through the park to the beach. I went for a little dip. It is hypothermia cold, but it was still nice to go for a swim. We went back east through the park, then down to the Haight and ate at Burgermeister. It was an $11 burger. It was good, but not that good. Then, we went down Market and around the Embarcadero. We visited the wave organs on the bay, and went to the Exploratorium. It would have been much nicer if there weren't so many kids and tourist there.

We stayed at the Exploratorium until closing and then rode up over the hill over the Golden Gate Bridge and back down the other side. It was really steep and we were going as fast as the cars. Ross actually passed an SUV on the way down. I am sunburnt and tired.

Friday, July 04, 2008

High Class

San Francisco has a higher class of bum. The bums here talk crazy in French.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

radio shack at 652 market has one wii back in stock if anyone is looking for one.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

tracy morgan is the new host of scare tactics. i may actually have to watch it now.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Two days off

Man, I am so glad I have two days off in a row. I admit that I'm totally spoiled, but I feel like I don't even have a day off if they're not two in a row.
now i just have to wait for soul calibur legends and i'm set.
delivery even
got my wiimote and nunchuk deliver!

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

How to get a Palm Centro with unlimited text and data for $30 a month

First, go get a Sprint SERO plan. I've pasted some helpful details are available from this site below:

There are three ways of doing this:
  1. The easiest way is to do it directly through the SERO website. Go to and use the following e-mail address : (TY Johhny G) or Yet another email that works for everyone is If these don't work for you, google an email address of a Sprint employee and see if it works. Google or Ajskhan (TY) found THIS link to an email addy that may work. A list of other emails HERE.
  2. You can also sign up for a regular plan in any Sprint store, and hope that a retention specialist is willing to convert it to a SERO plan for you. This is definitely the harder way of doing it, and takes persistence on your part to be able to pull it off. To talk to a retention specialist call Sprint (800-974-2221) and ask for retentions. Another #: 866-250-2221. DO NOT DO THIS AFTER BUYING A PHONE FROM BB, Amazon, CUSA, etc or you will get hit with a collections bill for the full price of the phone!
  3. For those of you who already are on Sprint: you can email Sprint eCare at and tell them you wanted to switch to SERO in store but they couldn't do in store and advised you to contact eCare with this code "#C SEROF&FEVDO$30.00". YMMV on this one (least effective way of trying to switch).

Pick the voice plan that best meets your needs and order yourself a Palm Centro. Now. Having cheap minutes and unlimited text and web seems pretty cool, but we're not done. How would you like to have unlimited broadband access on your laptop using your phone? Yes?

You could add phone-as-modem to your plan for $40 a month, OR you could go here and download the usbmodem.prc program for the centro and get unlimited bluetooth DUN (dial up networking). It's free to try out and then it's a one time $24.95 to buy it. $24.95 once sounds better to me than $40 every month.

You can get your computer on the web anywhere you have good Sprint coverage with either the USB cord the Centro comes with or via bluetooth. Bluetooth is a drain on the battery but sometimes it's nice to not have your phone dangling off your laptop.

The settings for using DUN are pretty simple. It's a data call and the access phone number is #777. Once you connect you should see speeds comparable to cable broadband. If it seems laggy or slow you may have to call Sprint customer service and get them to enable EVDO (Sprint's broadband service) for your account. I had to do this for my account. It only took ten minutes or so and resetting my phone a couple times for them to "provision" my phone for EVDO service.

That's it. The phone should be $100, the usb modem program is $25 and then it's as little as $30 a month for mobile broadband internet in pretty much any city in the United States. Leave a comment if you've got questions.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

The ones that are still alive...

I finally beat portal.
It's no small feat, considering that it ran at about 1/3 speed in parallels on my old 1.5ghz mac mini.

That ending song is superawesome! I downloaded it immediately. Then I went and downloaded the frets on fire pack that has it in it.

I sort of want to get myself a windows machine so that I can play portal at full speed. It's endlessly fun just to play around with the crazy physics of the portals.

Also, it looks like someone in a permanently paralyzed state like the guy who wrote The Diving Bell and the Butterfly is going to be a witness on Law&Order. The more ridiculous those shows get, the more I like them.